The comment:
I recently saw pictures of two of my friends at their engagement party. And realized that I wasn’t invited. And all of a sudden, all of the thoughts in my mind turned into thoughts of why wasn’t I invited, and maybe if I had invested more here I would be more valued. And the Lord gently reminded me that it wasn’t about me. My first instinct was, “duh, it’s about them.” And He said, “no, it’s about Me.” Why is it so hard for me to remember that? Why do I constantly want to worship myself instead of Him?
When I initially read this, I laughed. I laughed because I closely identified with your feelings. Just yesterday I was thinking about what life will look like when I leave my job in the fall and how I want to be remembered and missed. I began thinking of the ways that I need to intentionally seek out my co-workers and friends more so they will actually miss me instead of just being another person to come and go in our constantly changing environment. Pathetic, right?
Instead of caring abundantly more that camp is left in good hands and is doing good things to further the Kingdom, I was more concerned with my own emotions, my own heart… myself.
Unfortunately, I think it’s natural.
It’s natural for us to want to be included, to want to be invited, to know that we’re worth it and that we matter to other people.
I guess, at this point, I think that life is going to be a series of these humbling moments where we aren’t included, when we don’t get invited, when we don’t feel worth it or that we matter to other people. It’s in these times that I feel like the Lord really gets to speak to our hearts… and we go through exactly what you described.
We realize it’s not about us…and it suddenly hits us that it’s about those people, or about camp, or about whatever else. And then the Lord prods further and reminds us that it’s actually about Him and Him receiving all the glory. Oh… yeah… that.
I think it’s okay.
I think this shows that the Lord is going to bring us to these places that we aren’t even capable of getting to ourselves. He takes us deeper into a place beyond us realizing what it’s really about… a place we don’t typically go on our own accord.
Instead of beating yourself up about how you fail over and over again about not remembering that He’s the one who receives the glory, or that you worship yourself instead of Him… simply let Him take you to that place with Him.
‘Cause the moment you start beating yourself up over how you didn’t remember and how you constantly want to worship you…guess who you just put the focus on again?
Let those ‘Oh yeah’ moments take you further into a place of worshipping Him, into a place of thanking Him, into a place of just being with Him and all of His glory.
Clearly, I need to do this, too.
It’s not about us. It’s not even about them. It’s about Him.
For Christ’s sake, right?